Letter of heart
by NiimuraYume
Summary: Ken writes a letter - Youji finds it... sad, sad, sad ... oh yes, and it is YAOI


Weiss Kreuz 

**By White Angel**

****

**Letter**

Yohji,

I am tired.

For a very long time now I'm living a lie. And I don't mean the whole 'flower shop-assassin' story. I am talking about you and me.

You have no idea how it feels, seeing you walk off with yet another girl. Every time you go on a date it tears me apart inside.

I can't do this anymore.

Ai shiteru.

I know, you don't believe it or you don't want to believe it but it's true.

Tell Omi and Aya, I'm sorry.

I love you, Yohji, and that's why I am doing this.

Goodbye,

Ken.

I stared at the pages blankly, the meaning slowly sinking in.

Panic rose in me, a panic so strong, it threatened to overwhelm me.

When I realized what that letter meant I was on my feet in no time, dashing out of Ken's room, screaming.

"KEEEEEENNNNN!!!!!!!!!!"

A very sleepy Omi poked his head out of his room and mumbled something like 'What's going on', yawning greatly.

"Where is Ken?" I asked, not bothering about the young boy.

"Ken? I… think he's down in the shop, why?"

I didn't answer and stormed downstairs, reaching the door to the shop when I realized I couldn't just storm into it. What if there were customers?

So instead I took a few deep breaths to calm myself down before I pushed the door open.

I saw an old lady leave the shop with one of Aya's beautiful bouquets. Except to her the shop was empty. A sigh of relief flooded me when I turned to Aya.

"Aya, where is Ken?"

The redhead looked at me a little surprised before answering: "He went shopping, we need food."

I turned to leave when Aya stopped me: "Why?"

I stopped in my tracks but did not turn around. "Forget it." Was all I mumbled before hurriedly leaving the shop.

Outside I started to run again, hoping I wasn't too late.

There was a shop, just down the street where we lived. We usually went there when we needed food quickly.

I rushed into the store and searched it for my Ken.

Who would have thought that Ken was… no time for that you have to find him!

There he was, standing in front of some tins, looking miserable.

I did not think when I sneaked towards him, not making a sound from long practice.

I pulled him close, crushing him to my chest, frantically trying to convince him not to do it. I knew I was babbling, but I couldn't help it. I whispered into his ear, trying to make him understand.

Ken was stiff in my arms and when I turned him around I saw confusion on his face.

I held him on arm's length, staring into his eyes. "Let's go someplace else, shall we?"

He nodded, still confused, and I dragged him out of the shop, leaving the groceries behind.

We stopped at a small park, sitting down on one of the stone benches. We were all alone.

"I found the letter." I stated and I saw his eyes widen. He refused to look at me, staring at the floor instead.

"Then you know…" he whispered hoarsely, burying his face in his hands.

"Hai."

That was all I could say because my throat tightened, making it hard for me to breathe.

I swallowed several times before I continued: "I know... but why didn't you just tell me?"

"I thought I made that clear… why would you of all people understand this? You are the one with a new girlfriend every few days!" he started to yell at me by now. "I sometimes think you never date a girl twice!" he was crying by then, tears streaming down his face.

"That is right." I said flatly, refusing to look at him, at his back.

"What?"

"You're right, never twice." I speak softly, as if afraid of telling it. To be honest, I am afraid of Ken finding out, I was for the longest time.

But now it was time to showing this secret to him.

When I looked up at him his face was turned to me, half of it hidden by his shoulder, but I still saw the painful expression in his eyes.

He bowed his head, trying to hide tears I already have seen. "Why?" he whispered. I could see his shoulders shaking.

I slowly approached him, my hands reaching out for his trembling form. "Because… I wanted to protect you… and myself… I tried to fight it, tried to fight the change in me, tried to fight you. I did not want to admit how I felt, I thought I would save you like that."

He turned in my arms, looking up at me with shimmering eyes. "Save me? From what?" he looked so young and innocent at that moment, I wanted to hide him, protect him all over again.

I hesitated but then I pulled him against my chest, encircling him and whispered: "from me… from the world… from everything."

He relaxed against me, letting me hold him as I had always dreamed to. I smelled his scent, burying my face in his hair, lingering there, whishing for that moment to never end.

But everything had to end eventually, and I did so by kissing his hair, murmuring the words I never had meant so much in my entire life: "Ai shiteru." 

~owari~

just great… I stop writing, and a week after that I open this file and see that all that's missing is one word J owari.

However, this was just a dream I had and I couldn't get it out of my head so I wrote it down.

I hope you liked it,

C YA,

White Angel.


End file.
